Free Fuel

So food. Yes, we all have to eat. The problem is, as a runner and a nutrition freak, I've found myself feeling deprived and quite possibly malnourished. My mother always told me it is okay to eat whatever you like as long as it is in moderation. Easy for her to say. This women can be craving chocolate, take a bit of a Snickers bar and save the rest for later. And, by later I mean days, weeks, months. My obsession with food began long ago, when as a child my all-time favorites included: french fries, cinnamon and sugar bagels, blow-pops, starbursts, skittles, all hell ANY candy.... My diet literally consisted of ALL carbs, and not the good kind. If I had not been an athlete, I would have easily weighed in close to 200 pounds. The one and only reason I gave up Pop Tarts was because I had the brilliant idea of consuming a few prior to basketball practice. Not one of my best ideas.

We always talk about how the media is to blame for eating disorders in our youth. Well, I am almost positive as a twenty-something female living in the heart of Hollywood, I have a issue with food and arguably in a good way thanks to the media's portrayal of how you can look and feel better by being on the thinner side. No, I do not force myself to throw-up, nor do I starve myself, but I do consume the same foods on a daily basis. If it wasn't for women who may or may not take care of their bodies to be on the cover of Self, Fitness or Runner's World, I very well may be suffering from diabetes instead of a lack of diversity in my diet.

There are many things I need to work on when it comes to food. I am WELL aware of all the foods that are good for me, and those that are not. The issue is, my obsession has caused me to fail at allowing myself to consume the foods that I know could improve my running, mood, sleep patterns, even give me added definition in my abs! I simply cannot wrap my head around eating normally. There has to be a happy medium. There has to be a way I can mentally find it acceptable to eat apples, watermelon and grapefruit. This obsession has put a damper on my ability to socially dine out once in awhile. I simply will not eat something if I do not know EVERY single ingredient.

I would kill for a slice of pizza right now. My favorite food is 100% french fries. I crave Mediterranean food ALWAYS. This particular craving is one that is on the healthy side, but God forbid I allow myself to consume grilled chicken or hummus. I can't tell you the last time I ate any of the above.

I have been called the energizer bunny, told I probably train harder than some professional athletes and run excessively without ever setting foot at a starting line. So, why can I not just eat. I try to keep up with proper nutrition literally. This is no use without actually utilizing the knowledge. I even go as far as telling my family what not to eat.

In the end, I may have ran 9 miles today and rode my bike everywhere (I do not have a car), but I will not let myself enjoy a nice slice of pizza! Ugh, the give and take of trying to be on the cover of a magazine. I do take my hats off to those ladies. At least I am not part of the obesity epidemic.